Tiger Woods’ “appearance” this past Friday offers some real lessons that high-performance Leaders should not miss.
Regardless of how you feel about Tiger today, don’t forget that just a few months ago, he was at the height of his professional game — posting top results in most of the ways the world keeps score.  Sure, he had a temper and was rude at times, but doesn’t that come with the territory of being Number One?
While he didn’t use the term himself, it’s reasonable to conclude Tiger’s therapy is for sex addiction.  I’ve known some bona fide sex addicts in my day, most of them now sober, and they, like all recovering addicts, will tell you this:

The addiction, as disgusting as it might be, is not the root problem.  The addiction is a surface symptom of a deeper problem.  The addiction is born out of seeking escape from the real problem.  To move towards sobriety, an addict must first uncover and address the pain that was the catalyst for the addiction in the first place.

I am not trained as a psychologist, but I’ve learned enough about these things to suggest that Tiger’s immense talent and his secret life are two sides of the same page.  The drive for each can be traced back to a common root, probably a pain he was seeking to escape.
To me, Tiger’s most telling statement was this one:

“My failures have made me look at myself in a way I never wanted to before.”

And this is where Tiger’s dilemma provides a learning opportunity for Leaders.
A Leader’s greatest accomplishments are “the other side” of their greatest vulnerabilities.  Guess what?  Leaders show their accomplishments and hide their vulnerabilities.
Here’s how this plays out.  In the early years of the (future) Leader, a variety of impressions — be they authority figures, family environments, the values and norms of society — come together to shape or “stamp” their inner life.  Call these impressions “voices” — “Always do this — never do that — Keep away from me — You are good when . . . .”  The developing Leader responds to these voices by developing certain beliefs — “I will be liked if I . . . , I will be successful when I . . . , I will get my way when I . . . .”  Further, they learn strategies to avoid punishment or consequences, and they build defense mechanisms to protect themselves from screwing up.
From these inner beliefs, two sides emerge for the young Leader: 1) an outward (exposed) expression of leadership greatness; 2) an inward (hidden) reservoir of beliefs tied to fear, guilt, shame.
Here’s the tricky part for Leaders — after years of building the layers of an outward reputation as strong and smart (and being duly rewarded with more power and money), they get better and better at covering over the ugly, immature parts of themselves.  They can get so good at this that they themselves grow blind to the vulnerabilities that are still very much alive within them.  In doing this, they deceive themselves.  Before Tiger deceived his wife, he deceived himself.
So you say, “Rob, I’m no addict.”  And I take you at your word.  But an addiction is simply the most extreme display of this hidden side of a Leader.  Most of us are somewhere along the continuum. And all of us are at risk of self-sabotage.
Consider these real-life examples:

• A CEO has fantastic presence in public, but struggles with self-confidence in private.
• A CEO is great at developing committed teams, but frustrates her followers when she can’t make decisions unless there is complete harmony.
• A CEO is praised for his boldness and risk-taking, but comes off as aloof and arrogant to those around him.

Like Tiger, we never want to look at the shadow side of ourselves.  And while few Leaders may experience the spectacular implosion that Tiger has, negative results are still inevitably commonplace.
For Leaders, they range from the really bad:

They get fired suddenly.  They go to prison for fraud.  Their marriage ends.  They are estranged from their kids . . .

to the merely disappointing:

Their company is good but not great.  They are successful but not significant.  They leave an inheritance but not a legacy.

I believe Tiger first read his remarks to his counselor and his therapy group BEFORE he read them to his family, friends and everyone watching on TV.  He’s obviously in the middle of addressing some deep issues, and hopefully, for his sake and his family’s, he’ll find healing and restoration.  Perhaps he’ll learn his self-worth is not tied to being at the top of the Leader Board.
So if you are a Leader who feels you’re at the top of your game,  pause and do a self-check.  Get with someone you trust to be brutally honest with you.  Ask them about your “blind sides.”  Take a hard look at the factors that have led to your success thus far.  Then turn them over.  What are they covering up?  What has made them such a driving force in your life?  Is there something there that needs to be dealt with in a healthy, pro-active way . . . before it puts you in the news . . . for all the wrong reasons?
FORWARD THIS TO A HIGH-PERFORMANCE LEADER.